There.

Angel kitty

I am using that as the title because it is how I feel... like I am "there". Or "here". Just, ambivalent, going through each day getting our work done. We've been so busy. Today we had to drive out to Thousand Oaks early to get my blood work done, then back to pick up the van for Mario and drove separate to Ojai. Dropped it off in town, then drove together to do 4 horses, then drove him back to the van so he could go to a car wash and sell some product. I drove to the bank to make a deposit, then went back and picked up Mario/dropped off the van again. Drove back to the client's where she had just come in with 2 new horses, we pulled shoes and trimmed them. Then drove *back* to the van so we could drive back to Ventura to drop off my car at the shop so it could get badly needed brakes. Mario then took me home and went out and did the Ventura route in the van.

Meanwhile, I got a call from the dr's that my HCG had only gone down another 200 pts in just over a week. Dr. Sunshine is recommending methotrexate to get this "pregnancy" over with, since the stupid painful scraping didn't do the trick. It is administered via an intra-muscular shot given by the doctor. It is a low dose chemo drug, and the side effects include nausea and fatigue (along with cramping and bleeding). I have to have a CBC and chem panel first, to make sure my liver and kidneys are working properly, and then I will get the shot. I am probably going to get it next week, when I have a lighter week work-wise to deal with any physical aspects. Even if we had the money to do another try at IVF, you cannot do a transfer for 3 months after MTX. So that means at least until June before anything else would or could even happen, so...

So... there.